Read with me, “Wait for the LORD; be strong, and let your heart take courage; wait for the LORD!’’ Psalm 27:14
When hope seems diminished and questions arise, I want to remind you that He is able, and willing, to listen to it all. I often think we as God believing Christians have stigmatised asking questions, lumping it together with any and every form of unbelief. Though I admire the sincere attempt at blind trust, I do feel like our most heartfelt attempts at innocence often times are merely testimonies to our absolute ignorance. He has never commanded us to not ask questions. He has instructed us to not fear. But He is not angered at questions, look at Mary in the Bible, and Sarah, and John, David.
He never asked us to manufacture our security, or to pretend. He wants us to love and trust. Did you know you can trust someone while still being doubtful of the outcome of a situation? In Mathew 28:16-17 we see, after the crucifixion, there were disciples that still doubted Him. These were the very men He chose, He walked with, He taught, and these were the ones, doubters included, He chose to entrust the gospel to, sending them out into the world. He trusted the doubters with His legacy and message in the very next verses. Ouch. We disqualify ourselves so easily, ascribing a character trait to the Godhead He doesn’t possess, such as dictatorial perfectionism. We automatically count ourselves out, assuming that is exactly His response to our challenges. He chooses what is foolish and doubtful and seemingly inadequate, and He uses them. He uses the ones who doubt, but still worship. He sends those who doubt, but listened to His words anyway. He deploys those who doubt, yet they serve with trusting Hearts. He never shuns the doubters, and neither should we.
Do not discount yourself from the call and purposes of God when in doubt. Do not ascribe to Him a tendency to dismiss you when in fact His arms are open wide. Your doubt does not disqualify you access from His heart and presence. He says come to me all who are weary and burdened, He says let us reason together, He says I have loved you with an everlasting love, I draw you with loving kindness, fear not, you are My beloved and I am yours. There is no separation because of doubt, there might be relational distance created in your heart, as you assume your just reward is a degree of separation you have to work hard at to diminish. No, His heart is easily found. His love is accessible and overflowing.
When we put our trust in Jesus, our hands are freed from the fetters of fear binding us to our circumstances, our arms gain a degree of movement again. As our intentional trust increases, we see an enlargement of perspective and influence take shape in our lives. The freer you are the greater degree of living you will experience. We bind ourselves to our circumstances by fear. Let it go. Trust in the One who holds your heart. Though circumstances can be daunting, choose to show up and love on Him. Serve, worship, seek answers, ask all the questions, because in searching you will find Him, in asking you will receive. He is not afraid of our doubts; He longs to still them with tenderness and care. He is the Father of hope, how will He not be a good father and offer you hope in times of distress.